Insanity episode

Life is a journey indeed. And it depends on myself on how to make the journey interesting. One hour ago, I was crying like hell on my existence, everything that I was in contact with brought me down until I couldn’t walk anymore, until I couldn’t breathe, until I couldn’t feel air in my lung, until I felt I am about to explode. I grabbed a pretty sharp and big scissor that I used to cut papers for my workshop.  Without hesitating, I grabbed a handful of my hairs and start cutting it. A handful after a handful after a handful...tears were running down, but I feel NOTHING in my heart. I start to get Goosebumps on my neck  and feel my own insanity. 30 cms hairs that I adore gone with no pain, SIMPLY no pain. I looked at my beautiful soulless hairs on the floor as if they were not part of me. I stared at them hoping they WOULD stare back at me and ask me WHY?? They are simply idle.  Like a psychopath I cut the remaining hairs, I was enjoying listening to every sound the scissors made…sraaaap..sraaaap, my ears were making love to the sound. I AM GOING MAD,  until no more hairs to cut. Small pieces are all over the room, EVERYWHERE.. like bugs and termites during summer time.  I closed my eyes, realizing that it was the furthest I can go…either to continue feeling miserable and low and useless and disgusting OR to face the world with new perspective and let HOPE grows as my new hairs grow and begin a new journey.