Story from behind the Horizon

Its been two years.. yes two years,

Time flies so fast that i didn't even hear the buzz of it wings. I didn't realize i left Karonga for such a long time until i woke up this morning only to find myself closing my eyes over and over my eyes  trying to remember Chitumbuka words. Two years left me only with a very few words. My heart beat, i hurried to a table where i stuck my books and writing notes. Carefully, i opened again words that i learn in Malawi. Words that brought me closer and closer to my community, to the last mile.  i remember i had to often switch languages between tumbuka and english while i was talking to amama and adada and they were just laughing seeing me trying so hard.

I could forget the words, but the memories would never fade. it has special box at the back of my head. Especially when the book where some ( and very few) stories were being written was launched few weeks ago. I could always go back and read and experience the same thing over and over again..

This is the best gift from my adventure in Malawi. Together with two other amazing volunteers who conquered Thailand and Ghana, we worked really hard to have it written somewhere. It was one beautiful coincidence and support from different people, we could packed the stories in one book with beautiful bao bab tree in its orange-ish cover.

From Java with Love :)

This is it, the end of the chapter although I believe this is not literally the end. One year journey in Malawi that I committed has flown faster than I could imagine. Right when I started to feel  the beat, right when I realized I am doing something, right when my project manager started to talk to me that making my works a lot easier, right when I was in love with what I am doing, with the people, with place where I am staying, right when I accepted bitter sweet that has happened.  It ended there.

I am going home with pride. I was doing something. I wasn't waste my time. I was gaining what I wanted to get when I said YES to volunteer.  Self acceptance..yesﾅsadly, i didn't appreciate who I was before I went there. Badly, I didn't realize that I was able enough to do big things.  My farmers who were weeping over my leaving  helped me to understand that I did something.  If they could see me as I am why shouldn't i? if they could appreciate who I am why shouldn't i? if they could accept me as I am, why shouldn't i?  The moments that we shared together was significantly changed me as a person.
It wasn't good bye, it was just "see you soon" moments.  Though I don't know how soon, may be in this life, may be in the next life.

Now I am starting my Java chapter.  I hope I can stop comparing so that I can live my life easier. People always told me that my life will change after African experience, which turn to be true. Jakarta seems too big for a small girl like me. Crazy traffics and rush hour makes me missing the solitude in Malawi,  a lot of stairs of crossing bridge make me missing quiet road while walking and crossing the road, plenty of choice of clothes shoes bags makes me missing the simplicity of Karonga, Actress wannabe of 10 year old girl with full of make- up that I met in the mall make me missing Olivia and Wani, the sweetest children in Karonga, People who are busy with their big gadgets makes me miss "Muli Uli" or " Matsuera Bwanji" greetings. Oh, how I live a different life nowﾅI hope I wont turn to be the same human after some timeﾅ

My fellow returned volunteer told me to give myself time that apparently went through the same process. I promise myself to take it easy  and live a day at a time.


Ps: i will keep writing this blog and tell stories about how I miss Malawi. Will also post some photos as I can access faster internet now, so stay tune everyone..

Sweet Love,
Lili

ITS ABOUT TO END...

This is it. The journey of “sharing skill, changing life” is about to end. One more month and it will be a different story. Many things had happened since my last post that change my way of thinking and how I see my placement. At the end, I am happy that I will leave this program without bitterness and grudge.

This change of course will not possible without help from many amazing people who share their spirit with me. My family in Karonga is endlessly giving me supports and lessons. Shannon, the cheers leader and captain eating (how do you stay slim with all those eating??), Patrick, the perfectionist and the best organizer (thanks for making sure all those glamour trips happened Papa P..you still owe me Nyika or Tanzania :P), Tendai, the sweetest and kindness Malawian (or should I said Zimbabwean?), Raphael, our baby  and growing boy (hey..dont forced me to sing German song again ok…), and of course Gustav, (oh Gustav I will miss you badly…thanks for being so strong taking us everywhere in Malawi. Those trips would have been different without you). I am so blessed to have been sharing my life with this family which at the end teaches me to appreciate more than to complain.

The 21 days holidays around Malawi with the WATERS team also gave me extra power to finish my placement. I would never imagine that we could share that much fun together. I found myself smiling every time I remember our craziness and yet we still can have some constructive meetings in between our hangovers. Who would finish two bottles of water from heaven in some hours? Who would swim and play “Truth or Dare”  in the lake after midnight where there might me some crocodiles looking for food? (Oh..who lost the pants again? lol) Who would sleep in the non-waterproof tend and get soaked at the mountain? Who would constantly hop on and off minibuses for 21 days with all those smells of armpits, sweats, chickens, and fishes? Who would get on to the truck sharing spaces with dead animals, 20 plus other people and luggage not to mention pouring rain?  Who would stay under the rain and help the driver to get out from the muddy road for almost an hour? Who would keep our bottle of vodka under the skirt in a café because we are all running low? Who would dance two nights in a row just because we find a real club to dance regardless the unpaid allowance? During the day we behaved normal, sharing thoughts and idea, talking about life and discussing about works, but during the night we behaved abnormal.

BUT guess what, THAT’S WHY I LOVE you Doris, Florent, Brenda, Esther, and Marije…you taught me to see my life from different angles.  You taught me that I shouldn’t focus on my misery and not to always think about it. You taught me life must go on regardless what has happened and I am the only one who decides how it must go on. You taught me to keep friends for life and YOU ARE friends for life.  I am so proud of this team and so glad that I am part of it.

I am looking forward to give my last workshop to my communities sometime this month. I will be savoring my last moments with them. They are the reason of my existence here in Malawi. They are the reasons I stay. They are the reason I am able to fight the demons inside me and win the compassion.  I really hope that my time here changes their life somehow even in a smallest way. I will treasure this experience with them. I will value the love they given me. I will always keep them in my heart.

Gardening and tree planting, i am having fun at least

"You should stay here for four years" said Mama Vannesa, one of my neighbors after telling her the use of herbs that i plant in my small garden. She said i can be their African doctor. I just smiled, i wished there are more that can hold me to stay for four years.
Slowly, i collect myself together after the last insanity. Simply because i want the remaining 5 months to pass peacefully, no grieve, no sorry, no other insanity (i hope). I spent the last 3 hours today working in the garden. Distributing cauliflower seedlings, preparing bedding for beans nursery, putting all herbs in one plot, i enjoyed it. Not just once, i screamed and shocked when i saw the small head of worm pop up from the earth when i scarified the soil. To be honest, i dont like them, but what can i say, they are best friend with my plants and have to see them all the time. Yikes...

Anyways, Karonga becomes warmer and warmer. I start seeing people sleep outside and seems they dont bother with mosquito while Malaria is the number one killer here in Africa. More people in the streets which sometimes irritating me, especially children who often following me asking for money, or simply want to bother me with chinness nose sounds. The more i tried to ask them to stop, the more fun it is for them and the more evil smile i saw in their face. But i learned the trick already, ignoring and giving them the very mean face will stop them.

It is so much different in the village though, children tend to behave like children that i know, shy, cute, and

Innocent.  The trip to the village the whole week last week encouraged me to give my best again. I am getting back my spirit. We distributed as much as 80.000 tree seeds in 10 different nurseries together with all necessary inputs that they need to work on their nursery. i enjoyed filling the polypack tubes with soil with them. we were having fun although sometimes i have no idea what they were talking about.  I promised myself to mobilize them planting those trees in the woodlot that they prepared before i am going home early next year. At least there is tangible work that i leave in this bitter sweet home.

This is what i do in Malawi

It’s been a while since I wrote my last post.  I am now on my fourth month being in the placement and somehow still survive regardless things which have happened, bitter and sweet. But that’s not the reason I am writing this post. Let alone complains and difficulties, they will not make my time running faster to the month when I am eventually going home. Instead, I will do what I can do, share as much as I can, get what I can get and prepare myself for best things that will happen in my life.

So i got questions from some friends, "what exactly are you doing in Malawi?"..."how do you work in Malawi?"..."how do you live in Malawi?" and many more..

one questions at a time ok, now i will let you know what am i doing here.

Tobilho Catchment Area

So the project that I am engaging now called Water Futures: Towards Equitable Resource Strategies (WATER). The main objective of this project is to link the grass root communities and community based organizations with the district planning process in terms of climate change. We are using the Ecosystem Service Approach which is a way of understanding the complex relationships between humans and nature, for use in decision-making and planning. We are closely working with the district planners in the district level and with VNRMCs (Village Natural Resource Management Committee), Women group, Area Development Committee (ADC), Village Development Committee (VDC), People living with HIV/AIDS, and other marginalized groups in the village level.

Dance mama dance...

The system in Malawi is completely different with the system that I know in Indonesia. However, slowly but sure, I managed to digest some of the information about how things work in the village level. For most of the outsider, it must be fascinating whenever they talk about their culture such us the sound of clapping is different for the chief and for the ordinary people, they will look somewhere else when they talk to you to show their respect, women should cover their lower part of body with citinje (sarong) for not showing their sensuality but the upper part can be opened as it is, they eat raw cassava as if is the most delicious afternoon snack,  they dance and sing every time they feel happy (which I found in contrary with most of the communities in Indonesia who are more serious and rigid) and many more local values that sometimes blew my mind. I am lucky to be part of of it now, well at least for awhile.

This is how we do mapping execise

The travel to my selected community is a challenge though. The transport in the district is not always available, the fuel to cover 100 kms plus (both ways) is ridiculously expensive, my direct partner who helps me with the translation is always occupied with other tasks. If I can choose, I prefer to stay close to them and watch their day to day life. Nevertheless,


through some days intensive meetings with them we come up with decision that we will plant about 90.000 trees and do some other adaptation activities during this project to increase their adaptive capacity. We always sing and dance at the end of the meetings.  Again, I feel so lucky.

PS: More explanation about the project is here https://hackpad.com/Project-2-Engage-to-Adapt-fxcESOfW6Ao